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Forums > The General Forum: Comedy

Ostrich

hollyoake

Date: September 22, 2006 @ 12:18 PM

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him.
The waitress asks for their orders. The man says, "A hamburger, fries
and a coke," and turns to the ostrich, "What's yours?" "I'll have the
same," says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order. "That will
be £9.40 please," she says and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out
the exact amount for payment.

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says,
"A hamburger, fries, and a coke." The ostrich says, "I'll have the
same." Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact amount.

For a while this becomes routine until the two enter again later in
the week. "The usual?" asks the waitress.

"No, this time it's a treat, so I will have a steak, baked potato,
and salad," says the man. "Yep! Same," says the ostrich. Shortly the
waitress brings the order and says, "That will be £32.62." Once again the
man pulls the exact amount out of his pocket and places it on the table.

The waitress can't hold back her curiosity any longer. "Excuse me,
sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact money from your
pocket every time?"

"Well," says the man, "several years ago I was clearing the attic
and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two
wishes.

My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would
just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be
there."

"That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would wish for
a couple of million pounds or something, but you'll always be as rich as you
want for as long as you live!"

"That's right. Whether it's a pint of milk or a Rolls Royce, the
exact money is always there," says the man.

The waitress asks, "But, sir, what's with the ostrich?"

The man sighs, pauses, and replies, "My second wish was for a tall
bird with a big arse and long legs who agrees with everything I say."

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